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- Written by: Don Goulding
I wait for the Lord
more than watchmen wait for the morning,
more than watchmen wait for the morning. (Psalms 130:6) (NIV)
Rajkamari was a lithe Indian beauty with clear almond eyes and gleaming hair down to her waist. This godly young lady obediently entered an arranged marriage at age fifteen to a mentally disabled cousin. When I baptized her in Chennai, India, she was in her prime, at age twenty-one, and faced with many years serving a childlike husband.
I guessed that Rajkamari was born into a culture with no other opportunities, so she went limp at her fate. But then, she expressed her inner thoughts.
“I love Billy’s pure, kind heart.”
Rajkamari spoke of her lifetime mate with the gratitude Jesus put inside her. She considered the promises in the Bible, and its commandment to honor her husband, and made the disciplined choice to wait for the Lord.
Rajkamari was neither a defeatist nor a materialist insisting on her way. She was a joyful daughter of the Most High God, set on leaving her future in his hands. She grasped a truth that often eludes me.
Waiting on the Lord is not for those who have no choice, rather it’s the radical path of those who know life is too important to squander on earthly gains. With titanium strong hearts, they trust God when physical senses report nothing but defeat. Only an incorruptible spirit, like Rajkamari, can truly wait on the Lord.
In her temporal life, Rajkamari had little opportunity for education or income. A girl born into her caste was scarcely respected above the family cow. But she seized an opportunity few of us even recognize. She clamped her delicate fingers around God’s promise to reward those who trust him, and she waited.
Prayer: More than the watchman waits for the morning, I wait for you, my King.
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- Written by: Don Goulding
His master answered, ‘Well done, good and faithful slave! You have been faithful in a few things. I will put you in charge of many things. Enter into the joy of your master.’ (Matthew 25:21)
Dani and I had global airline tickets that allowed us to serve whenever and wherever God directed. For one price, we could fly to any itinerary of countries. We began in the fast lanes of China and India, preaching and ministering nearly every day for months. Then we moved into the horse-drawn pace of Eastern Europe.
At first the reprieve was welcome, but I grew restless and prayed, “Lord, show us more ministry opportunities. Where would you have us go next?”
The answer was not what I expected.
“I want you to work on you.”
I spend too many calories seeking God’s direction for my life when the answer lies under my nose, literally. Rather than a ministry of deliverance and miracles, he wants me to reform my own heart. It’s not that I’m more important than those I serve, but I need to work on the plank in my eye before I can see clearly to help others.
Old fashioned stinky pride is at the root of my problem. I choose the glorious easy service of preaching to others, and resist the difficult work of amending my character.
So there I was with time on my hands, time to quit playing around with public revivals and get down to the business of examining the little nasties inside myself. Selfish Schmuck and Jealous Jerk are residents that have yet to convert. That’s where I must preach first, faithful in the small mission field of my own heart.
Prayer: Lord God, don’t give up your work in me.
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- Written by: Don Goulding
So, since Christ suffered in the flesh, you also arm yourselves with the same attitude … (1 Peter 4:1)
The stove burned my hand, and my lip quivered during the silence before a piercing scream. Years later, Grandmother passed away and left a gaping pit in my soul. Then my career culminated in business debt that plagued me with decades of worry. The lessons of life ingrain an instinctive aversion for suffering.
Then Jesus says, “Lose your life,” “Blessed are those who mourn,” and “My power is made perfect in weakness.”
Those teachings are so counterintuitive that I need Peter to explain. His letter says to arm ourselves with suffering. There must be something strong there, like weapons and munitions.
Ballistic power comes when I give up my attempts to dodge every hurt. If I can accept the fact that life includes a season of misery—always accompanied by strength from God to endure—then preoccupation with pain avoidance no longer owns me. I’m freed to live for the Source of life instead of for comfort.
Peter challenges me to adopt the same attitude as my suffering Lord. He doesn’t mean I should seek a new boulder of misery to move into my life. He only wants me to use whatever stone is already there, lay the plank of dependence squarely over the top, and leverage my heart toward God. The fulcrum presses me into his solace, where there is power for victory over another day.
I dance a jig when I see the enemy’s most hurtful rock forced into the service of lifting me toward the lover of my soul.
Prayer: Lord, may I use trials to move closer to you.